Posted via LiveJournal.app.

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Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Standing from the chair and stretching to his full height he walked through to Jensen’s room, standing at the door thoughtfully.  Why would someone with such raw desperation in his eyes have a gun that wasn’t loaded?  Did he really not mean to hurt anyone? Or perhaps he just couldn’t get the bullets. Or the bullets were on him somewhere. Jared had removed his jeans and boots when he was tending to the wound and had cut away his T-shirt, which meant Jensen lying there in boxers, didn’t have much room for hiding anything and it was clear from Jared’s own observations that he didn’t bring in any possessions from the car.

So that left two options.  The first, that there were no bullets in the first place, the second, that bullets would be secreted somewhere in this cabin.  Jared made a mental note to investigate the cabin in a more detailed way as soon as he made a check on Jensen.

From experience he judged that Jensen’s fever was still high and he located flannels in the small bathroom and placed them, soaked in cold water, on Jensen’s forehead and torso.  He would give it a while and if the fever was worse he would have to think about manhandling the injured man, unconscious or not, in to a cool bath or shower. Time would tell.  

He had checked his patient’s body closely for signs of other injuries and there was something else that, added to a gun with no bullets, held a real question mark.  Extensive bruising and contusions on his lower back and downwards, signs of possible rape or more likely given the type of person Jared imagined he was, the result of rough sex. Jared could make out the shapes of hands that must have held this man in a bruising hold, his body marked and scored with deep cuts.

He had no way of telling the time, he didn’t wear a watch on duty and Jensen had nothing on him but from the way the dark was gathering outside the window he guessed it was probably 10pm.  Which meant he had now been up for Jeez too many hours without sleep running on pure adrenalin.  So what now? How do I sleep and still make sure I have control of this situation? Something to tie Jensen to the bed, just one hand, loose enough to be comfortable, tight enough to make sure I have a warning if he tries to struggle. . Years in ER meant that Jared was a light sleeper I’ll hear if he struggles…

Whoever said necessity was the mother of invention wasn't wrong and Jared was proud of his tangle of tea towels that seemed secure enough.  I’m not leaving him alone in here, I need to feel he is here… feel he is OK … The bed was wide enough for two normal size people but in his fever Jensen wasn’t exactly on ‘his side’ of the bed which meant 6 foot 4 of Padalecki had to lay half on and half of with one of his feet on the floor, he’d slept in worse positions. 

In the blink of an eye Jared Padalecki, prisoner and captor fell into a sleep filled with nothing but dead black, no dreams, no thoughts, just sleep.

 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Mike watched carefully as his partner told him goodnight, grumbling good-naturedly as he left about obscene working hours and actors who should know better and left it a good half hour before he made his own move home.  Nothing in his actions indicated anything other than that of a man on his way home after a long day but, if you knew Mike really well, as only few people did, you would see the act, the tense hold of his shoulders, the worry that dulled his blue eyes. 

 It took him very little time to cross town and quicker than he imagined he was sat with his laptop perched precariously on his knees, swallowing coffee like it was going out of fashion. Clicking on his IM client he waited patiently for confirmation of who was online.

The list was ominous in its absence of his friend and the un-shaded icon next to ‘redballoon1978’. 

Baldy127 wrote: Hey man

He waited for confirmation that his message would be delivered as soon as his friend logs in then he sat back - give him some time he’s there, he must be there, it’ll be fine, he’ll be fine … it will just be a matter of time

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Joan and Bob were foster parents extraordinaire, both in their early 50s and unable to have children of their own, they took in children on both a short-term or if needed a long-term basis.  Their first child stayed on a more permanent basis through to adoption and it was through that very child, now a man, that the little girl they looked after now had become such a bright part of their lives.  She had been with them for 6 months now, called them Ma and Bobo and gave them a run for their money every day.  

Despite her problems or rather in spite of them she was a joy to foster.  They knew nothing of her back-story, only that her Mother didn’t want her and her father couldn’t look after her due to circumstances out of his control.  Joan could not believe why anyone would not want such a beautiful and gentle child but apparently, according to Mike, who spoke with some authority on the matter, the mother simply couldn’t cope with a child that didn’t fit into a definition of ‘normal’.

It was enough that Mike had asked them to care for her, with a promise from them that they would keep the child safe.  An ex policeman, Bob sensed there was something their adopted son wasn’t telling him but he didn’t share his concerns with his wife, just made sure that their charge was watched and cared for as well as he could.

For the best part of 6 months they had grown to love her with an unconditional affection. She was called Angel.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 

Jared wasn’t sure how long he had been asleep but when he did wake up it was pitch black outside and it was quite obvious from his position that Jensen had not moved once, still dead to the world. 

Yawning Jared reached over and gently felt the back of Jensen’s neck, still hot but not quite as hot as before and he felt the familiar sense of relief he felt when a patient of his started to improve.  Crossing to the bathroom he used the toilet, then at the sink splashed cold water on his face rinsing out the taste of sleep from his mouth and spitting into the sink.  The doctor in him moved to briefly check on his sleeping patient and he judged that Jensen probably needed another shot, rummaging carefully in the supplies until he found what he needed.  

As he sat on the bed next to the unconscious man he took a minute to carefully observe him in his relaxed state.  In the hospital he had been bordering on manic, wild eyed and dangerous, in the car he became icy, in charge and frighteningly calm, in fact the nearer they got to the cabin the calmer and more focused he had appeared to become.  And how much of that was real?

He was a study in contradictions that seriously confused Jared despite his current mindset still being stuck firmly in the fucking furious phase.  He had so many questions to ask, not least why, where, when and who. And why me you bastard? Why did you need to scare the shit out of me? 

 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

In his waking dreams Jensen had hopes and they were very simple, to be happy and healthy and to be part of a real family with his beautiful daughter. To be with Jennifer, laughing at her sweet observations on life, loving her, being her Daddy.

Mike I don’t know how much more I can take in here, I’m like the most obvious target

In his sleeping dreams he couldn’t find that single point of hope.  In Jensen’s fevered imaginings he couldn’t even find Jennifer, he tried to focus but she was nowhere that he could see.  In fact, despite how hard he tried to reach her she was kept from him by unseen hands.  How can Daddy let this happen, does he want leave me? In his nightmares he was hurt, cut and beaten and torn apart and every moment he endured he knew she was made to watch his agony, just out of his reach, silent tears rolling down her face. 

As they cut him, tearing, pulling, laughing, his friend’s words were mocking him … I wont let anyone hurt you… 

Jen, just hang in here for 2 more days, just 48 hours Jen …please just hang on

You are too late man ... I'm already  dead

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Jared found it hard to get back to sleep, this had happened before, where he had gone so many hours without sleep that his internal body clock was screwed.  Added to that it seemed like Jensen was maybe coming round as Jared laid there and listened to him began to mumble in his sleep and watching as every so often he would twitch like small electric shocks were coursing through his body.  Half sleep… 

He hadn’t untied the smaller man, not for any sort of punishment and an urge to hurt him (he had talked himself down from hurting the guy in a terminal way), more for the fact that he was damn well going to get answers when Jensen woke up and for that he needed him in one place.  His complete fear of Jensen had disappeared almost as soon as he discovered the empty gun.  The gun made the man, and in this case the lack of bullets somehow dented that hard almost vicious exterior that he had first seen. Wake up will you…

 “Jensen, come on man” Wake up, wake up, wake up…I need to know what is going on 

Jensen stopped his twitching and Jared promptly fell back to sleep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 

Jensen’s nightmares had started to change, the memory of Jennifer was no longer part of the images, this time he had solid memories of fear and pain and they played out in a macabre sequence in his head.

It’ll be OK Jensen, you know what to do 

But I don’t, not really

Remember pretty boy

Too many hands holding him down, one over his mouth, other hands were pushing at his hips as yet another cut deep into his side. Each stitch torn out along with skin. One.  Two. Three…

Jensen’s body reacted to the mental attack and pulled him out of his unconscious state with a dragging, shaking, panicked breath, his eyes half opened scared to see what may be around him.  He was frozen he couldn’t move.

“Mike” he gasped out …

“Jared” came the reply from his left.  With great effort he moved his head, wincing at the pain behind his eyes. He looked up, and up and finally he saw him and memories flooded back in one huge rush.  His heart fell as he remembered bits and pieces of what had happened.

“Uh” he managed very clever.

“Uh exactly” came the quick and dry reply.

Jensen needed to move, just to stretch, to feel his extremities, to check he was all there.  He found out about his tied wrist at the same time as the pain in his side spiked and he turned glazed unfocused eyes back to Jared.

Jared just watched him steadily, his hazel eyes wide with expectation.  Jensen tested the bond and it gave a little, he frowned. 

“Tell me what hurts” Jared instructed firmly… I need to get this out of the way first

“Kinda everything” Jensen coughed his voice rusty and dry.  Jared cupped the back of his head and lifted him slightly to offer a sip of water … blessed relief. 

“Specifically?” Jared placed the water back on the nightstand and felt gently around the puffy wound, sensing the shift in the other man’s body with each touch.

“My side, my head ….” Hesitation … Jared was a doctor, Jensen had been unconscious it was inevitable Jared knew it all, “My back … and …” He shut his eyes, embarrassment flooding him.

”Yeah, but no tears there, no infection” Get it in the open … get it out of the way.  Jensen visibly deflated, still refusing to open his eyes. Jeez. “I’ve been pumping antibiotics into you and your side, believe it or not will heal over, awesome scar though” 

Jensen didn’t move, just turned his head away from Jared, squeezing his eyes tighter as images from the last few days started to overwhelm him.

Jared watched not really knowing what to say next.  What question should he ask first?  I’m so confused, what do I say?  Where on earth should he start? What is with the physical hurts, why no bullets, why take me, why here? 

“Where do I start” He managed to say? Unspoken - just tell me everything…

Grief welled up inside Jensen, all consuming and forcing angry tears from him, Jennifer, that woman in the hospital, the gun, the kidnap, the pain. 

“I am a killer, I am just like them”

Hold him. Both of you hold him. These are coming out babe, one at a time. Noooo.

Hold him you idiots, I can’t do this on my own. Stop struggling you little bitch.

Please don’t … my family … please …I wont say anything

Cool man, that is tearing the skin …message received I think

Someone is coming man, finish already, aaggghh no

“Stop, don’t move” The stranger forced out between clenched teeth, straightening and waving the gun in Jared’s direction.  Jared stopped.  He wasn’t going to argue with a loaded gun.  When he first joined the ER he had received training in defence against patients who went too far.  The training emphasised that  at all times in a event like this staff should appear confident but in a non threatening and welcoming way and he raised both hands, palms upturned, hunching slightly,  trying to make his height seem less imposing. 

He remembered the scenarios they played out in training; gangs wanting drugs, babies being stolen, terrorists, and each idea seemingly more outlandish than the last.  Jared even remembered some guy on the course suggesting the training should cover how hospital staff should handle alien invasion. But nothing i the training sessions had prepared him for the real life experience of staring down the barrel of a gun; a gun held by someone with desperation in tired bloodshot eyes.

 “Hey buddy,” he began softly … seem like a friend, relax … “what do you need?” The man with the gun wasn’t listening, so much for calming the guy down, if anything Jared talking to him seemed to agitate him more.

Jared could see quite a wide spread of blood soaked into some sort of pale blue material but he couldn’t immediately see any dripping blood which was a good sign that the wound was seeping and not gushing.  As he watched the man leaning back against the door he assumed that blood loss, or indeed exhaustion, was obviously starting to weaken the injured man’s resolve to remain standing unaided.

“Is one of you a nurse?” He said gruffly, still with the gun on Jared.

At the man's question Jared sensed rather than saw Sue start to move out from behind him ready to admit she was a nurse, ready to place herself in harms way. uh uh not gonna happen

“I’m Doctor Padalecki.” He interrupted Sue, stopped her from saying anything “What can I do? What do you need?” He watched as the man shook his head and found his eyes drawn to the gun still firmly pointed at him. Calm him down, talk to him, talk him down…

“Hey dude” OK good start,  friendly yet professional “Just give me the gun and let me help you” Jared reached out one hand as if to accept the gun.

“Stop” the clearly exhausted man bit out “Just stop” He gestured to Sue, a look of quiet determination hardening his features “here, you, stand here, next to me”.  No, leave her out of this … Panic flared in Jared as Sue moved past him but he couldn’t do anything, he had to choose the right time, and he settled for  squeezing her shoulder letting her know he was OK and that she would be OK.  Sue was now within Jensen’s reach and Jared watched as with an economy motion the gun swung from Jared to her.

“Stop this bleeding....”  This ground out with a grimace of pain.

“OK, OK.”  Deep breath, calm down.  He looked directly into Jensen’s eyes, “I’ll help you, it’s what we do here, but you need to let her go man” Jared injected a note of pleading into his tone, trying to reach the guys rational side, but it seemed like his pleading served only to wind the guy up more. Anger crossed his face and his mouth tightened.

“Do I look stupid?” Jared could hear the slurring in the injured man’s voice and his concern turned to fear as he heard the ominous click of the safety being released on the gun.  Shit he’s got the gun resting on her throat. No, No.

The guy’s next words said with venom and hate sent a chill of terror into Jared “I’m not stupid”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Jared wordlessly raised his hands again and took a step back … be professional he’s hurt, I can help him, he’ll leave, Sue will be ok, I will be ok…breathe 

“Show me” Jared instructed and winced as the man dropped the blood soaked material to the floor and pulled his T-shirt away from his side, watched as their injured captor grimaced when it caught in dried sticky blood pulling skin apart and causing brighter, fresher, blood to bubble to the surface.  Jared assessed the situation, as best as he could, from a distance and mentally listed what it appeared he would need, scanning the room about him for the appropriate supplies. 

Gesturing towards one particular shelf he looked to the injured man for permission to move.  The man just nodded but Jared didn’t miss the way the gun pressed more firmly to Sue’s neck nor that the guy’s grip on Sue tightened causing her breathing to hitch.  Jared’s eyes met hers briefly and he tried to communicate calm, not sure if it had any effect.

Grabbing what he needed he moved closer and dropped to his knees his height putting his face level with the wound.  Quickly scanning he realised the wound had been recently stitched but the stitches had come away, forcefully if fresh tears evident in the skin were anything to go by.  The wound was raw and oozing blood.  Jared had seen people delivered to the ER with a slow bleeding wound before, where the visit to the ER was just too late and the patient died , the body just stopped fighting and the patient went into shock. Jeez the gun, it's at Sue's neck, on a hair trigger...

He worked calmly and steadily feeling no remorse as the man flinched at each touch; not one iota of admiration that he had refused any sort of anaesthetic.  The injured man remained resiliently silent and Jared wondered if that was due to bravery, stupidity or an unwillingness to admit pain or any vulnerability to these two strangers.

The guy had relaxed a little and some of the colour was returning to his face and Jared judged a transfusion wasn’t necessary even if the guy would have let him try.  Fixing the last of the bandages he stood up, his legs numb and his gloved hands covered in the guy’s blood.  He had managed to stop the bleeding, cleaning and stitching the wound as best he could and covering it.  He had a key and he had access to antibiotics but an injection was refused, he imagined even though he was a doctor he was in the not to be trusted pile there.

Always clumsy with his height and thick with fatigue and fear he stumbled, as he stood, moving close to his patient in his haste to catch the stumble.  As if in slow motion the injured man reacted strongly to a perceived threat and his hold on Sue loosened, the gun moved and Sue fell abruptly away and to the floor hitting her head on the side of the shelf as she fell. Shit. Shit. 

Immediately dropping to her side Jared checked her over, she was OK but unconscious.

“Is she OK?  Is she OK” There was an edge of desperation in the injured man’s eyes as he stared in disbelief at the unconscious woman. Jared shook his head and looked up at him shocked to see a brief glimpse of raw grief in the man’s eyes.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 

Oh my God what had he done?  No one was supposed to get hurt and now he was guilty of murder. Oh my God, Oh my God. I’ve got to get away, get out of here.

Steeling himself and blinking back angry tears he pulled on the tall guys sleeve “Move, get some stuff, get out” He gestured to the door with the gun and in a daze pushed the doctor before him hoping the ER was as quiet as when they arrived. I’ve got nothing to lose now 

How they managed it he would never know but they ended up at his car, a nondescript sedan that sat on it’s own at the edge of the car park.  “Get in” he spat out and the Doctor turned to face him confusion on his face. Don’t argue just get in the car

“Get in, I can’t drive, so just get the hell in”

“Man ….”

“In”

Jensen tracked the Doctors movements until he sat in the driver’s side and holding the gun to him he passed him the keys. “Just drive. The freeway, North” He urged loudly and watched carefully as the doc fumbled with the keys struggling to get his belt on and move the seat Jeez this man was tall. Very quickly they had moved from the car park and onto the freeway, the Doctors hands tight on the wheel.

Jensen found himself staring at those strong capable hands, hands that refused to shake as they had stitched him up, hands that had felt for the woman’s pulse and found nothing. Oh my god what now, what do I do now…I never meant to hurt anyone…

The pain in Jensen’s side had quietened to a dull roar and he had at least remained conscious up until now.  For that he was thankful and he knew that he just needed to reach the cabin and he’d be able to think, be able to breathe, be able to stop.

Shifting he tried to get as comfortable as he could whilst handling the gun, twisting painfully against the new stitches and grimacing at even having to do this, the gun feeling cold and unyielding in his hand the metal still slick with his own blood. He couldn’t get the image of that woman out of his head; he couldn’t believe he was responsible for hurting her, for murdering her.

“I never meant to hurt anyone” I said that out loud 

“Forgive me if I don’t believe you”

“That girl –“

The Doctor turned to look at him a look of anger on his face. “Sue, her name is Sue”

That stopped discussion.  Jensen didn’t say anything else; he didn’t know what to say. What could possibly make this right?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 

Jared concentrated on the driving as much as he could with a gun pointing at him.  He thought he had seen flashes of remorse and worry in the guy’s eyes back at the hospital but now all he saw in him was his expression alternating between rage and an icy blankness - both really scared him. He didn’t have any idea why he led the man to believe that Sue was dead, but if he remembered rightly his only thought at that time was to keep Sue out of harms way.

He felt no remorse at misleading the bastard who now held a gun inches from his face but did feel that persistent worry that he was expendable and once they reached this destination what was the older man going to do with him then?  How much more use was he to this damaged man when they reached wherever they were going?  

There was no way he was going to give up without a fight; his brother was a cop and he had taught him some limited moves; he could hold his own and it wasn’t as if he was a small guy, and for goodness sake his captor was weak from blood loss. 

It’s just that he didn’t really know much about guns and he hadn’t heard for definite the click that might mean the safety was back on.  Added to that this guy looked like at any moment he was going to collapse and with his finger near that trigger he knew it wouldn’t take much for a bullet to land in him.  So he would keep his head down, wouldn’t speak, would follow instruction and try to stay small and subtle.  He could do that if he tried … tried really hard.

“Pull of at the next gas station” Jared didn’t acknowledge the words just kept his eyes open for the next turn off.  A gas station would be a good chance to get away, to distract the guy, to get help. A certain amount of hope filled him but at the same time along with that hope came the nerves.  He could admit he was scared; there was no shame in that and this guy looked dangerously unsteady and on the ragged edge.

When they stopped though there wasn’t much chance at first to do anything, the gun remained at his back and no words were exchanged.  The older man snagged a jacket from the back seat whilst Jared filled the tank and then took the cash that he was given.  “We pay, we say nothing, we leave, no one dies” His captor growled pushing the barrel of the gun against Jared, reminding him of it’s presence, before pulling it behind the jacket.

They paid, they said nothing, they left and no one died and for that Jared was thankful.  It had taken him his very best acting skills to remain calm and exude an aura of his normal cheerful friendly self. Smiling and nodding where appropriate in the nightmare of bright neon lights and security cameras.

He had no chance to do anything as they were very quickly back on the road, nothing at all.  All the same he felt like he had missed his only chance and that his family may well be hearing about his death in the next few days because he had been too chicken to do something about it. 

What else did I learn at the training sessions, they said something about connections; make it personal; make him see you as a person.

“My name is Jared, Jared Padalecki.” He ventured cautiously, his voice rusty, not taking his eyes from the road.  The other man raised his eyebrows and an uncertain look crossed his face.

“Jensen” He offered quietly, “Jensen Ackles”

“You know that you could leave me on the side of the road man, I wouldn’t say a word, I’d just turn my back and leave you to go.”  Silence. It’s not working, he’s not falling for it…

Jared saw Jensen, and how odd was that name, pull his hand through his hair and move the hand to rub his open palm over his three-day stubble verging on beard.

“I cant”  He sounded almost sad or was it just that Jared was reading into the tiredness in his voice? “I need your help ….. I have my reasons and I will have your help …. Whether you want to give it or not ….. I have no choice.

TBC